Gate Two - The Art of Love

Gate Two:  The Art of Love

My Contract with Myself:

I have come to love

I have come to move my ego aside

I am moving to an alternative space:

A space that encompasses only love.

Love of the universe, of friends, of nature, of the sounds all around me, and of all living things.

I love my whole self.

I love me just the way I am; I would not want to change a thing.

My signature that I have come to love

What is love?

Is love the act of being in love? Is it losing track of time and space, of day and night? Is it the feeling of being neither hungry nor tired? Of wanting nothing more than to be with the person who is the object of your love, to give up everything else, to be unconscious of time? Is that love?

What tools have I learned from Yoga to understand what love is?

According to Yoga tradition, love is not a feeling. I will never stop loving you, because love is a way of consciousness.Therefore, I don’t change my mind. I don’t love you today and stop loving you tomorrow. Love, according to the wonderous world of Yoga, is… love. Love is its own entity, its own essence, its own language. Love is unconditional. Love in Yoga is likemy love for my children: it does not cease and does not change. It is constant and evermore. It is not an emotion that shifts withcircumstances. That same unconditional love translates into my love of all things in the world.

If that is so, how is it that I may feel that love has ended?

How can we quantify love? How can love end? After the initial falling in love, I find myself shifting into routines, commitments, schedules, and habits that override the wondrous feeling of falling in love. That drunken feeling of all-encompassing falling in love disappears or wanes a bit. At that point, I begin to account, to criticize, to judge, to make demands, to take ownership, and to feel entitled to my acquisition. I am no longer in the same presence of love. 

What tool does Yoga provide me so I can live a life that transmits love?

Yoga teaches me that staying in a state of love involves a complete lack of power struggle. Love, according to Yoga,professes no demands, no expectations, and no disappointments. The wavelength that transmits love involves only love, enlightenment, quiet, comfort, and freedom. I have nothing to acquire or gain from you, and no criticism of you. There is nothing about you that I wish to change or alter. I love you just the way you are. I release you.

How is this state of love even possible?

How can I separate my ego from its need to acquire, take ownership, or possess? How do I set it free? This is the art of love. If I cannot master this, all my relationships with myself, with my life partner, with my children, with my friends, and with my students will be complicated and complex.

Therefore, my greatest wish for myself, and for you, is that we make use of the tools of Yoga that teach us what love is and how to fall in love anew every moment of every day: with each flower, each person, each animal, and with ourselves, as we progress towards the wavelength of Yoga. Because Yoga is love. Yoga is connection. Yoga is oneness. The daily practice oflearning to love according to Yoga is one of the greatest tools available to us. Therefore, it must be practiced daily. Once the shift occurs and is achieved, once we transmit on this alternative frequency of Yoga, life flows through an alternative pathway:  the frequency that is love.  

I promise to be intently aware, in every moment, of any attempt I might have to alter, acquire, take over, criticize, or pass judgment. Instead, I will see only the spiritual essencewithin you, rather than your external being. I will reside in the open passageways of an alternative pathway. This requires constant practice. Love is an art that must be practiced and learned.   

Anahata

The Chakra of the heart

The Chakra of Anahata is located in the middle of my chest. It is physically connected with my heart, my vascular system, and my immune system. I recognize that certain things affect me,causing my chest to tighten or shrink in capacity and my breathing to become shallow and labored. Other things, however, open my heart and make me feel that I have more room to breathe and that my breathing is lighter; my chest feels comfortable, freed, and soft.

If someone hurts my feelings, it feels like a stab to my heart. My heart aches and clenches. When I am happy, my heart feels relaxed. I might draw hearts, string a chain of hearts, or send someone a heart. Cardiologists explain that heart health and the shape of the human heart can be affected by our emotions.  I can therefore understand that when someone experiences profound anguish, it might be said that that person “died of a broken heart”: they took so much into their heart that it was literally under attack. They died of a heart attack. 

This area of the body is so much more than flesh and blood. It is a major energy center. When the energy center is open, it is available to be filled with unconditional love: love that is not dependent on external factors. I don’t love you today and cut myself off from you tomorrow.  Rather, I live in an alternative state of consciousness, in which I have left my ego, my self. I am no longer concerned with my self: what hurts me, what’s hard for me, what’s wrong. I love my self enough to take good care of it, so that that worry will not weigh me down, as if I am my own best friend. I care about my self. I indulge my self. I love my self. This same wavelength of self-love connects me to everyone and everything around me. I live life within this wavelength, with an open heart, seeing each person around me in terms of their internal essence, not their external being. I ask for nothing. I expect nothing. I do not harbor disappointment. Suddenly, I can walk erect; I can open my heart and my chest. I have more room to breathe. 

The chakra of the heart is connected to our sense of touch. Whatever I touch, even my eye contact with someone else, transmits my energy. 

The element of this chakra is air, as it connects to my breathing. As I breathe more lightly and more effortlessly, I access a more spiritual wavelength. The color of this chakra is green. It expands to fill my chest with cleanliness, freshness, and infinite abundance. 

For me, the chakra of the heart represents all the compassion, the love, the generosity, the balance, the softness, the empathy,the caring, the devotion, the sensitivity, the forgiveness and the absolution of those around me.  I practice diligently so that this energy source from my heart will maintain its open status. I want to ensure that my heart stays open to the transmission of love, and that my hands are outstretched to give as much as possible: 100%, 110%, with as much devotion as I can muster. I am a lighthouse, shining light that bursts forth and communicates with the ship far off in the distance. My body has no walls, no barriers. The light bursts forth.   

So, let your chakra of Anahata be in a state of openness. Give it love. Give it a place to love. Remember: Yoga is love. In all relationships, the most important ongoing question is: whatfacilitates connection? What creates more love? Nothing else is of consequence, not power, not acquisition. Be open. Be air. Be love. Be Yoga.

Yoga.

Ahimsa- nonviolence

Ahimsa, nonviolence, is one of the core tools of Yoga.  I must refrain from causing harm through my thoughts, my actions, or my words. When I am in a state of consciousness towards nonviolence, I can access ephemeral stillness. During my physical practice, as I connect with a movement, I learn to relax into that movement. I don’t force the movement, and I am not violent towards myself. The practice becomes a self-exploration, with no goal to achieve.  Similarly, when I ride my bike, run, or swim, I explore how the movement in the sport can flow through me, effortlessly and nonviolently. Pressure, stress, and force lead to injury. It is said that when a person resides in a state of nonviolence, that energy creates a force field of peace and love that is both felt and contagious. We all want to enter that space because it is so inviting and pleasant.

The Search

To deepen my practice, I ask myself questions. In Yoga, this questioning is known as Svadhyaya - the exploration and internal research. It involves an ongoing self-exploration, so that I can identify those energy points that might be blocked and therefore prohibit me from accessing true freedom and true joy. These are the points I need to work on every day. This daily research is my life’s work.  

Now is a good time to stop, pause, grab a pen and paper, and take a moment after each question to listen to your heart and write down what you discover there. 

• What is the “weather” in my heart right now? Are the skies blue? Is it rainy? Partly cloudy? Clear? Foggy? Stormy? Describe the weather in your heart at this moment.
• Are you willing to compromise and give in your relationships, or do you feel the need to always be right? 
• Are you willing to give up control? to release the need for ownership?  To give up power for the benefit of finding a balance?
• Describe a relationship that feels safe, secure, and like home for you. As you contemplate that relationship, describe how it feels inside your body.
 

Snacks for the Way

I accept you as you are,

Without trying to change you.

Without trying to mold you to fit me.

Without trying to acquire or own you.

I will support you so your light shines through.

I will accept me as I am,

Without criticism.

Without judgement.

I will see the light within me.

I will refrain from complaining today.

I will seek the good in everything.

I will see every detail in life as a source of love.

This is also a good place to pause a minute and write down some reflections. 

What will you take in your backpack?

“I give you rice so you can live.

I give you a flower, so you have a reason to live.”

As we conclude this gate, please take a minute to journal some reflections of gratitude.